Trash in the Streets 22 - 15 April 1994 p. 5, 14

"It was no surprise..."
Thomas: April's Safe Sex Pin-Up

One of the criticisms of the pin-up campaign in the darkroom-scene has been that the posters and messages were not 'hard' enough. For a long time many people have asked for more threatening AIDS prevention messages. "Just put a person who has AIDS on a poster or on television and let him say: 'I've got it; take care you don't!'" Thomas, the April pin-up, says exactly this.

AIDS prevention officials have always opposed this kind of message. Research shows the fear element works, but it is short-lived. After the initial shock and attention the public tends to turn even farther away in an attempt at denial. In a wider audience hatred and discrimination often occurs toward the affected groups - the infamous British 'tombstone' campaign was an example. It succeeded in getting attention among the British, but it was short-lived, uninformed, and the campaign was followed by widespread anti-gay violence.

Our pin-up campaign volunteers, however, are not health professionals and pay attention to what the men in the scene say they really want. Thomas is the first PWA (Person With AIDS) in the Netherlands to appear on a poster.

Thomas is German in origin. We asked him why he came to Amsterdam.
"Actually, I've been coming to Amsterdam regularly since 1983. I had a relationship here, but it was only in 1989 that I moved to Amsterdam and not only because it's a beautiful city but also because of its tolerant atmosphere. You can be 'gay' in your daily life, something which is not always easy in Germany. In Germany you have a strong pressure to present a front; I mean, when you want to be someone you have to have money, a position, a car and a wife in order to acquire some status.
"In 1989 my boyfriend died of AIDS. I had myself tested and turned out positive. It was no surprise. I would have been astonished if it had been negative. Many of my friends were already dead by then. After the test I stayed permanently in Amsterdam. My career in Germany became less important and I left the management company of which I was co-owner to do the things I liked."

Is your HIV infection the reason you took part in this project?
When you asked for my help in the project I said yes. Perhaps it was because I am body positive, but also I used to be very active in AIDS prevention and care in Berlin. I had already collaborated in the making of posters, and with the booklet "Safer sex for leather men." Next to that, I was International Mister Leather in 1987, which also involved a lot of safe sex promotion.

What has been your experience with safe sex?
Sometimes I wonder just what is safe and what is not. The safe sex guidelines are based on statistics. Generally speaking it is easy to avoid the real unsafe techniques such as fucking without a condom, but then there are many practices where it is questionable if they are safe or not. Take sucking, for example. There is always a chance someone will come in your mouth, which at least increases the risk of infection. Although I am diagnosed with AIDS and also have sex with sero-positive partners, I still choose to have safe sex because of the chance of reinfection. But I know not all sero-positives do this. They sometimes have only a short time to live and thus reason the risk of reinfection to be unimportant. It took me a long tune to accept that reasoning, but now I think I understand.

Do you tell your sex partners you are infected?
Sometimes you don't know if someone is sero-positive, or you are sure he is negative. Then I usually tell them afterwards, when I know him better and feel more at ease. By the way, I don't find it easy, to make love to someone who is sero-negative; it often feels very uneasy. Of course it depends too on the person.

You work at Euromen, a company that produces and distributes SM video's. Do you consider it important that the video's are safe?
Yes. only we don't often show that clearly. Porn video's are meant to stimulate fantasy, they're fun, not educational. That's why you don't usually see someone put on a condom before fucking. Like we don't show someone smoking a cigarette in between scenes. Anyway, S&M offers so many opportunities that are all safe.

Did your life change because of the disease?
Only last year I got my first major infection. I lost 25 kilo, but the year before I hardly had any trouble. The doctor allows less travel and certainly discourages my going to tropical countries because of the risk of infections. I am really sorry about that. Sex has become less important to me, too. I mean, it is just less horny. When I go out now it is often more for social reasons. Also, I took care of my affairs. I have an excellent insurance and because of that I can do a lot of things I want. I think that's a good tip for everyone. Take care to insure yourself well! At the moment it's still reasonably easy. AIDS is extremely expensive, and when you have to live on social security there will be little money left to do anything nice with your life. You can always get AIDS, no matter how careful you are.

Martijn de Natris